honestly

Feeling it right now.

Feeling every bit ignored as I am. 

I know I don’t deserve it, but I can’t help wanting to feel it. 

Needing to feel it. 

YOU ARE ALL PAINFUL AND I WISH I COULD MAKE YOU A SUMMER’S DAY WHERE EVERYTHING SHONE
AND NOTHING BURNED
BUT ITS TOO LATE FOR ME.

ASH I FELT, ASH I BECAME,
ASH I KNEW TO PREPARE FOR WHAT REMAINS.
UNDER SOFT AND BENDABLE RESISTANCE I HAD FOUND
THE USELESS PINING MURMUR THAT KEPT ME ON THE GROUND.
I CHASE THE DAYS YOU SPOKE TO ME WITH TEARS LEFT ON MY WRISTS.
YOU TOOK MY HAND AND WIPED AWAY THE OTHER DAYS YOU MISSED.
I WONDER NOW HOW YOU CAN LIVE WITH UTTER USELESSNESS,
AND I REMEMBER ALL TOO CLEAR HOW YOU WALKED AWAY FROM THIS. 
NOW I SEE WHAT I SHOULD HAVE DONE THE MOMENT WE MET EYES.
I SHOULD HAVE RUN. THIS SUMMER’S DAY IS EQUALLY MY DEMISE.
THE MORE WE CURLED, THE MORE I LOVED, THE BIGGER THE HEART WE PAID,
I MISUNDERSTOOD EVERY MOTION, YOUR IGNORANCE MEANT YOU’RE AFRAID.

LETS RELIVE THE FIRST TIME; I BELIEVE MY HAPPIEST DAY.
I WOULD DRIVE UP, TURN AROUND, AND FUCKING WALK AWAY. 

Sep 14
fuCK

realist shit I’ve ever read in my 22 year old life.
Sep 9

realist shit I’ve ever read in my 22 year old life.

(Source: anamorphosis-and-isolate, via babygirlpamir)

"The saddest word in the whole wide world is the word almost. He was almost in love. She was almost good for him. He almost stopped her. She almost waited. He almost lived. They almost made it."

- Tiny Stories (via untamedunwanted)

(via bonibennett)

Sep 9

"I just want to pour my soul out on someone and not have to worry about the mess I’ve made."

- Andrea Slicker  (via lovequotesrus)

(Source: psych-facts, via mernzz)

Sep 7

"I almost thought you needed me back."

- 7 word story (via fragile-diamonds)

(via joshpeck)

Aug 29

I miss what it felt like. 

To be loved, I mean. Really loved.

Aug 29
Tbh,

You know, I was thinking today.
When you love somebody, all of their flaws disappear. You don’t see them anymore bc that person becomes perfect to you. That person is a world within themselves and you just want to know all about it—good or bad because it is what it is. That is who they are. Who they were meant to be. People don’t really change, and when they are forced to, they aren’t happy. I find that it was easier to stay and not be happy because they were still perfect to me.
I realize now that I was never perfect. There was always a list of things that was wrong with me or that I needed to change or else. Always. I never remember a time where I asked if there was anything wrong with me (or something he could change about me) and he didn’t have something to say. There was always something, regardless if it was the same thing from when I asked the times before.

Always.
That makes me feel like I was never truly loved. That makes sense though, you know? Nothing would have happened if it was real love. Even though it makes sense, it doesn’t make me feel any better. It makes me feel even more blind.

My bed sheets are cold.
The shower is lonely.

Aug 26

I miss feeling in love.
Not being in love.
Feeling is a big uplifting life changing thing and being just feels like death.
Paranoid if they kill you.
Paranoid if they don’t.
It’s not fun anymore.
It’s no fun.

Aug 25
hplyrikz:

Clear your mind here
Aug 21

hplyrikz:

Clear your mind here

psychofactz:

More Facts on Psychofacts :)
Aug 21

psychofactz:

More Facts on Psychofacts :)